So much time to waste

I don't feel bad today. I don't feel good. It's just kind of a little peaceful, it being Saturday and everything. For some reason, I don't feel as much of the dread that I usually feel. And that's good.

That is good. What are you going to do, farmboy?

I want to eat breakfast, but I'm apprehensive about it because I don't want to use up my calorie allotment for the day.

And that will happen if you eat breakfast?

I'm afraid it might. I don't know. I can't figure out how my body works. I go under the calorie count a lot of days but it doesn't seem to make any difference.

Let's talk about something else. This talk is making me hungry.

Okay. What else are you going to do today?

Practice my songs. Walk. Crossword puzzles, word games. Jeopardy! on Netflix. There's not a whole lot, I'm afraid. Which is one of the reasons I'm looking for a fuckin' job, you know? It's terrible when you have so much time to waste, because time is precious. It really is. But I'm doing the best I can.

It's okay to veer a little bit from the schedule, farmboy. You've been very disciplined. Is there anything you can do that's new to you?

I'm sure there is. There's a chance that I may go to the store, or even to my brother's house. But that doesn't usually happen until Sunday, which is just fine with me. I just want to hang around today. Maybe I'll use the coronavirus as an excuse to not be around people. If I go to the store, I'm just going to buy bad food to eat. It's that kind of day.

I should take the trash out, too.

That's work.

I know, but it's necessary.

Are you going to smoke weed?

No, it's too early. I don't smoke until I've completed everything. 

Maybe I'll eat a banana. Maybe I'll give in and make breakfast. Who knows? It's another day of fun and adventure in the life of farmboy.