all those rumors, they're not true

time's running out
I'm falling behind
in a world out to
rob me blind
so what do I do
to catch up to you
all those rumors, 
they're not true
it's self-defense
it's number one
it's the milky way
and a hot dog bun
saints, preserve us
I live in service
to the nervous 
and all those
wearing rags instead of clothes
you are not among them,
I suppose

I got mine

the truck broke down
and we missed the bus
lord knows what will
become of us
me and the wife
couple of kids
we're in hard times
we've hit the skids
but no one cares 
everybody's feeling fine
saying
I got mine
I got mine

just a child

don't mind me
I know I'm just a child
and I don't have any right
to an opinion at all

let me go

the world is spinning
around and around
and time is standing still
I can see the next horizon
from here, over the hill
I've done my share of living
I believe I've had my fill
I am an old man
let me go

I know and I have and I still do

How did it go last night, farmboy?

Oh, man, it was so fuckin' great. I played the song and it went over well and I hung out with friends and got hugged a lot. Still…

Did something happen?

No, not really. I think it hit me that Richard's not going to be at at the coffeehouse except to give lessons. But as much as that saddens me, if he thinks it's time for him to move on I have to support him, you know?

But there's this other thing, it's…you know, it seems like there's just this sadness now in everything I do. It's just lurking in the shadows, you know what I mean? And I think that's part of what they call clinical depression.

Which you can get help for…

I know and I have and I still do, in the form of medication. And I am very thankful for that, believe me. 

So I don't know just how much of a concern this is. It's just there and it separates me from what is really going on.

Well, farmboy, I do think it's a concern. It obviously bothers you.

Yeah, it does. I don't know, man, I always think I'm standing still when the truth is that I'm always in transition. You think I'd know everything by now.

But, yeah, it was a good night. There was a real community and I was part of it, no matter how hard I try to deny it.

Paper on a music stand

So I'm playing a show tonight. It's an appreciation concert for my friend Richard from the coffeehouse, and I was asked to play.

Is that what your new song's for, farmboy?

Yeah. Ain't nothing like writing with a deadline, man. Actually, strike that. Ain't nothing like memorizing a new song. It's so fuckin' hard for me. It causes me so much stress. I mean, I can barely remember the words to my old songs, you know?

I've got some advice for you, farmboy.

Yeah? Good. What is it.

Just relax when you're up there on stage, Will you have the words with you?

I will, yeah. I hate doing that but it's better than just blanking out.


You've practiced the song quite a bit, farmboy. You'll be fine. I bet you'll just be using it as a reference.

That's what I'm hoping. I really don't want to go up there and stare at pieces of paper on a music stand.

I don't think that you have anything to worry about, farmboy. It's a good song and it's going to mean a lot to your friend.

That's what I'm hoping. I'm proud of the song and I just want it to go well so Richard can hopefully enjoy it.

never as alone

I was never as alone
as I was when I was 
sleeping with you
in our ill-gotten bed of despair
you were my bonnie
I was your clyde
as we waltzed through life
like rogers and astaire