boredom can be

today I'm fragile
boredom can be seductive
when you're scared like me

kid in the playground

this is what I am:
I'm that kid in the playground
standing alone
waiting for the end of school
waiting to go home
you never noticed me
but somehow you remember
you were glad I was not you

this is who I was:
I was the all-time loser
standing by myself
wishing school was over
wishing I was someone else
if you think hard enough
you're bound to remember
you were glad you were not me

this is who you are:
child of privilege
flower in the garden
center of attention
of whatever you were part in
on second thought
maybe you won't remember me
no one of use to you

your face again

ain't no voice
calling me on the phone
ordering me around
to find my way back home
and so on home I'd go
obeying like a dog
tail between my legs
breath smelling of alcohol
but this time it's different
this time I'm up for a fight
I think tonight
I'm gonna turn left
where I always turn right
and I'll know then
that I'm never gonna
see your face again

in the photos we stand
barely past eighteen
you in that spring dress
me in my farmer jeans
and when I asked you
for your unwedded hand
I didn't realize
I could never be the man
the man you wanted
who would run around your course
down at the racetrack
try to train me like a horse
but that was then
and I'm never gonna
see your face again

ain't no memory
strong enough to stay
I'm gonna gather them up
and throw them all away
throw them in the dumpster
throw them in the trash
throw them where you throw
useless visions of the past
I've got an empty canvas
a world full of paint
and I'm gonna look for
exactly what you ain't
it's at an end
and I'm never gonna
see your face again

mom and dad

remind me 
what a fuck-up I am
inform me 
why I turned out so bad
make sure I know 
that I was unplanned
go ahead
mom and dad

meditation for dummies

one breath, another
breath, in and out, back and forth,
over and over

I got questions

I got questions
I been looking
for somebody like you
someone to teach me
what the hell to do
maybe I don't know much
but I know it's true
I can learn
I'll follow through

testing

testing testing
is this on?
am I making sound?
is anybody listening