Friday, December 31, 2021

new day


I'm looking for a new day
not like yesterday or the day before
it's true I've got plenty 
but I always want more and more
I've got food to eat
a roof over my head
friends and family
what do I need instead?
I need to feel peace 
in my heart
where do I start?


Thursday, December 30, 2021

very same thing


everyday I do the very same thing
very same thing
very same thing
that I do everyday
there is no up or down
right or wrong
I just accept it
as my way
so I look around
what do I see
so many people
in front of me
sometimes I need to be alone


Wednesday, December 29, 2021

nothing works out


no matter what happens
nothing works out
you can try your hardest
you can scream and shout
you can compromise
you can play real tough
but remember, fact is
your best ain't good enough

I do what I can
but nothing works out
everyone on earth knows
what I'm talking about
you don't stand a chance
you don't have a clue
nothing but trouble
is waiting for you


Tuesday, December 28, 2021

very much alive


one thing about life
is that it is fatal
but I am still very much alive
I still can feel with my heart
I still can see you
through my eyes
my life is not over
I am still here
right now
and I will live each day
although I don't know why
although I don't know how
anyway, I survive
I am very much alive


Monday, December 27, 2021

day off


I'm taking the day off
from the job of being me
I've formed a union
and we all disagree
with the way I treat myself
disregarding mental health
ignoring insecurity
so I'm taking the day off
from the job of being me

I'm turning the phone off
and I won't return your calls
your texts are all unread
and I've got some alcohol
I'm leaving yesterday behind
I need time to unwind
to finally feel free
I'm taking the day off
from the mess inside of me
'
          no need to worry
          the worst thing I will do
          is eat up all the cheeze-its
          and watch endless you tube

I'll be back tomorrow
I just need a break
from all my worries
and mostly my mistakes
but for now I feel okay
drifting my life away
I once was blind, but now I see
I'm taking the day off
from the job of being me


Sunday, December 26, 2021

yesterday is gone


yesterday is gone
never to appear again
so why does it still haunt me
those times of way back when
all those days of long ago
turn around and hurt me so
I've tried my best, but I don't know
the spirit that's inside me

many years have come and gone
but I still remain
you'd think that it would change somehow
but it's all stayed the same
I have tried the best I could
to turn the evil into good
I've done everything I should
and still peace denies me

          I've worked all my life
          and I'm still not done
          I want to be the man
          that I have become

all those days behind me
need to find a place to rest
all my failings remind me
that I have tried my best
all this time and I'm still not done
I'm close now to the setting sun
hoping like I've just begun
I still can't give up
even though I've had enough
yesterday is gone
but I'm still fighting


Saturday, December 25, 2021

ready for snow


Christmas is here
and it's going to be a mellow one
for this year I have been blessed
with peace and acceptance

I am now ready for snow


Friday, December 24, 2021

let there be peace (rewrite 1)


let there be peace
in the war zone of your mind
when bitter thoughts control you
when you leave yourself behind
let there be peace
in the coldness of your heart
when love is forgotten
when fear tears it apart
in this time when sadness
never seems to cease
let there be peace

let there be love
when you're feeling all alone
when you're lost and you can't find
your way back home
let there be love
when the road ahead is rough
when everything inside you
says you're just not good enough
when emptiness and hurt 
are all you can think of
let there be love

let there be hope
when hope is nowhere to be found
when the ways of life
try to push you underground
let there be hope
when you haven't got a friend
and your chance of happiness
feels like it's at an end
in this time of feeling desperate
and you don't know how to cope
let there be hope

let there be peace
let there be love
let there be hope
let there be enough


Thursday, December 23, 2021

let there be peace


let there be peace
in the war zone of your mind
when bitter thoughts control you
and you leave yourself behind
let there be peace
for the coldness of your heart
when you forget about love
and fear tears it apart
in the times when sadness
never seems to cease
let there be peace

let there be love
when you're feeling all alone
when you're lost and you can't find
your way back home
let there be love
when the road ahead is rough
and everything inside you
says you're just not good enough
when emptiness 
is all you can think of
let there be love

let there be hope
when hope is nowhere to be found
when the ways of living
try to push you underground
let there be hope
when you haven't got a friend
and your chance of happiness
feels like it's at an end
in the times of feeling desperate
and you don't know how to cope
let there be hope

let there be peace
let there be love
let there be hope
let there be enough


Wednesday, December 22, 2021

how my eyes wept


oh how i cried
without you by my side
the night when I found out
how much you had lied
it mad me so blue
I was so damn upset
oh, how my eyes wept
how my eyes wept


Tuesday, December 21, 2021

blank page


a blank page
an empty head
out of ideas
so instead
I'll tell you about my daily life
right and wrong and left or right
I'll tell you something
that you might believe

I wake each day
get out of bed
visions of grandeur
in my head
I play guitar
and write my heart
and wait for real life to start
I'll tell you something
that you might believe


Monday, December 20, 2021

come inside


you are someone's daughter
on your journey in this world
you know peace and love oughta
be the flag you have unfurled
but I can see the fear inside you
that you try to hide
please know you can trust me
let me come inside


Sunday, December 19, 2021

the worst day in the world (for the mandolin guy)


today is the worst day in the world
today I put my dog in the car
and drive him to the vet
for the last time

it will be the last time
that I will hold him
that I will stroke his fur
with all the love that is inside me

everything will be too quiet
there will be nothing moving
when I come home this afternoon

all that will be left
are memories
that I can't think about
right now


Saturday, December 18, 2021

the usual way


the world moved sideways
and then upside down
that's how I feel
whenever you're around
everything's black and white
and various shades of gray
and nothing ever happens
the usual way


Friday, December 17, 2021

on days like these


on days like these
I stay inside
stay under the covers
that's where I hide
I don't send texts 
I keep off the phone
I lock my door
and stay at home
and there I do
whatever I please
on days like these

the sky is gray
and filled with rain
in this apartment
I don't complain
I accept the weather
clouds overhead
I pull up blankets
and stay in bed
I listen to deejays
shoot the breeze
on days like these

          on days like these
          you wait for time to move
          on days like these
          nothing ever improves

on days like this
I do not leave
but life still has
something up its sleeve
it might be trouble
it might be joy
it might be whatever
you employ
Lord, help the man
inside of me
on days like these


Thursday, December 16, 2021

everything depends on you


I went walking through the neighborhood
just passing the time of day
when I saw a man with sunken eyes
passing me along the way
I said "mister, where you going?"
but he didn't answer back
he just kept on moving
to where the train meets the track

          what do I do?
          where do I go?
          when the world tells me  
          secrets I don't know
          where do I go?
          what do I do?
          in days like these
          everything depends on you


Wednesday, December 15, 2021

old man winter


it's cold and I'm frozen
in more ways than one
it's early, but winter
has already begun
problems multiply
and seek out your peace
discovering ways
to make it all cease

          old man winter
          don't come 'round my door
          'cause I don't need you anymore

snow is overrated
and rain's cold and wet
my life's filled with promises
that will never be met
just get it over
what winter brings
get me through these months
till I can see spring

          old man winter
          don't come'round my door
          'cause I don't need you anymore


Tuesday, December 14, 2021

you've begun


you've got to make a movement
you need to get up and go
lying down in sadness
is not the only life you know
open up the door
and step in the sun
I don't know where you're going
but I see you've begun


Monday, December 13, 2021

toast


I am cold 
it is raining
storms are brewing on the coast
at times like this I'm always
looking forward to toast
maybe an English muffin
or a tortilla will do
but toast is what
I'm looking forward to
in weather like this
what I enjoy most
is a warm and buttery
piece of toast


Sunday, December 12, 2021

patience of mind (rewrite 1)


all the secrets of my past
that I never knew
remain a mystery
after all I've gone through
I guess it doesn't matter
whatever I do
I've tried everything I could
I've been to the doctor
I've been to the priest
I've paid my repentance
to the deceased
I've made my decision
I'm looking for peace
but it don't do me no good

          but still I keep searching
          still I keep hunting
          looking for something
          I don't know what I'll find
          I don't know where
          but I know it's around here
          I need patience of mind
          patience of mind

all the traumas of my youth
where did they go
they keep hanging around
why? I don't know
they live inside my actions
hide above and below
I cannot hide from their fighting
they murmur inside me
they don't speak the truth
they capture my courage
with whatever they do
an eye for an eye
and a tooth for a tooth
the fire inside me is lightning

          but still I keep searching
          still I keep hunting
          looking for something
          I don't know what I'll find
          I don't know where
          but I know it's around here
          I need patience of mind
          patience of mind


Saturday, December 11, 2021

patience of mind


all the secrets of my past
that I never knew
remain a mystery
after all I've gone through
I guess it doesn't matter
whatever I do
I've tried everything I could
I've been to the doctor
I've been to the priest
I've paid my repentance
to the deceased
I've made my decision
I'm looking for peace
but it don't do me no good

          but still I keep searching
          still I keep hunting
          looking for something
          I don't know what I'll find
          maybe I don't know where
          but I know it's around here
          I need patience of mind


Friday, December 10, 2021

Christmas has begun (rewrite 1)


all the colors in the world
are meeting in the sky
hovering over the city
in the blinking of an eye
shining over the horizon
tilting toward the sun
a full December rainbow
Christmas has begun

Halloween is over
Thanksgiving's at an end
and nobody's ready
for the holidays again
the internet is crowded
with sales from Amazon
break out your credit card
Christmas has begun

          bells are ringing in the mall
          selling gifts to buy your sweetie
          if you eat all those cookies
          you'll get diabetes

there's lights on the tree
tons of tinsel too
those songs you've been dreading
now live inside you
snow forms and falls 
melting on the tongue
time to count your blessings
Christmas has begun
don't forget your jacket
Christnas has begun


Thursday, December 9, 2021

fallen angel


so many little problems
fill the spaces in my brain
I'm filled with rage and anger
all I do is complain
so when I have a peaceful moment
I tend to hold it close
because somehow I don't trust it
it may be a lethal dose

so I am left to worry
about everything and more
the headlines and the deadlines
wolves waiting at my door
if I could accept the quiet
I would settle down and rest
but then I wouldn't have myself
to scold and second guess

          give me a minute
          to look around and see
          there's a fallen angel
          and he lives inside of me

there are many ways to burden
your heart in times like these
love is just a memory
and fear is a disease
so I will keep on moving
for someday I will find
all signs of hope and kindness
that I have left behind

          give me a minute
          to look around and see
          there's a fallen angel
          and he lives inside of me


Wednesday, December 8, 2021

winter has begun


all the colors in the world
are meeting in the sky
hovering over the city
in the blinking of an eye
shining over the horizon
at whatever will come
a full December rainbow
winter has begun

Halloween is over
Thanksgiving's at an end
and nobody's ready
for the holidays again
the internet is crowded
with sales from Amazon
break out your credit card
winter has begun

          little kids are looking
          for Santa on his sleigh
          the air is getting cold now
          snow is on its way

there's lights on the tree
tons of tinsel too
those songs you've been dreading
now live inside you
springtime is far away
summer is gone
time for gloves and jackets
winter has begun

          the days have grown shorter
          the nights are way too long
          the birds have all flown south
          you won't hear their morning song

all the colors of the world
are seen in Christmas lights
on rooftops and windows
they shine through the night
snow forms and falls in flurries
melting on the tongue
time to count your blessings
winter has begun


Tuesday, December 7, 2021

winter cooking


winter cooking
soups and stews
freshly baked bread
will have to do
December kitchen
coffee brewed
toast and jam
breakfast for you

winter cooking
it's just begun
nutmeg and sage
cinnamon
kids and cookies
they decorate
don't eat too much
stomach ache

winter cooking
pineapple and cloves
tamales reheated
on the stove
lots of snacks
with lots of cheese
some of that
and some of these

winter cooking
lots of fun
enough food
for everyone
break out the wine
pour the beer
I like it best
this time of year


Monday, December 6, 2021

busy day


I had a busy day
woke up and drank my coffee
went to work and came home
and now I am here
in front of my computer
catching up with the world
and all its problems and worries
all the things that I fear
after a while, I'll go to bed
a couple of pillows to rest my head
and for those of you
keeping score
tomorrow will be like
the day before
and at some point I will say
I've had a busy day
and it will be just like today
except it isn't
tine has moved
and I have not
all the days I spend
are days I've forgot
it doesn't matter anyway
I had a busy day


Sunday, December 5, 2021

to be with you


I'm standing here waiting
anticipating
you to walk on by
I'm going through it
I can do it
we can make it if we try
trouble moves through midtown traffic
trying to get in our way
but we are tripping the light fantastic
we're living for today
can't you see
you were meant for me
to be with you


Saturday, December 4, 2021

2021


I've got my cap on backwards
and I look like shit
and, brother, that is not
the worst of it
bought my son a shotgun
he tore up his school
it was their fault
for enforcing the rules

          Lord have mercy
          ain't we having fun
          this is life in 2021

the year's almost over
it's going to be through
and there's so much
we didn't do
so much for health,
equality and free speech
there's so much trouble
bubbling down beneath

          Lord have mercy
          don't say we've just begun
          this is life in 2021

war and famine
a woman's right to choose
drugs and violence
front page news
so much for this year
it's going to be in the past
the most I can say is
it's better than last

          Lord have mercy
          it's hard being number one
          this is life in 2021


Friday, December 3, 2021

you will always be young (rewrite 1)


too many candles
too many cakes
too many worries
too many mistakes
don't look in the mirror
don't think about your age
no matter what happens
you're turning the page

          you will always be young
          you will always be young

you once were a child
my, how you've grown
so much has happened
since you left your home
all that crying and moaning
it's a natural fact
but you've got something inside you
you always bounce back

          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          
          time moves slowly as you float downstream
          it happens only if you're lost inside a dream

too many candles
too many cakes
you'll get there
no matter how long it takes
so it's off to the future
wherever it may lead
I hope that you find
exactly what you need

          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          you will always be young


Thursday, December 2, 2021

you will always be young


too many candles
too many cakes
too many worries
too many mistakes
don't look in the mirror
don't think about your age
no matter what happens
you're turning the page

          you will always be young
          you will always be young

you once were a child
my, how you've grown
so much has happened
since you left your home
all the pain and hard times
that's a natural fact
but there's something inside you
you always bounce back

          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          
          time moves slowly as you float downstream
          it happens only if you're lost inside a dream

too many candles
too many cakes
you'll get there
no matter how long it takes
so it's off to the future
where it may lead
someday you will find
exactly what you need

          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          you will always be young
          you will always be young


Wednesday, December 1, 2021

standing up


trouble hanging around my door
I don't need you anymore
you've won this time
you've knocked me down
but soon you won't be hanging 'round
'cause I know what's been going wrong
you have told your lies for way too long

          I've fallen but I'm standing up
          I've fallen but I'm standing up
          I've fallen but I'm standing up
          and I'm standing on solid ground

you've knocked me down and laid me low
I had nowhere else to go
but I can't go back to before
'cause I don;t need you anymore
i'm telling you, I've had enough
'cause I am made of stronger stuff

          I've fallen but I'm standing up...

someday I'll look back and laugh
happy on my own behalf
every mistake that I have made
every dept I've left unpaid
I'll accept them all and more
when I find what I'm looking for

          I've fallen but I'm standing up...