on hold

I've been put on hold

and I can't speak with anyone yet

I've got urgent business

and it makes me really upset

so I called this number

to move the process along

but somehow everything

is turning out wrong

the music on hold

is grating to my ears

I wish there were

something else to hear

I wish someone

will answer this line soon

I've been on hold

this whole damn afternoon

please please answer

let me know you're out there

don't leave me here waiting

I need to know someone cares

I'm biting my nails

I worry all day through

and the only person who can help

is you

so someone, answer the phone

and ease my troubled mind

help me get things right

don't leave me behind

I do my best

and I do what I am told

so be a pal

don't leave me on hold

sometimes when nothing happens

sometimes when nothing happens

it's a blessing, not a curse 

sometimes when nothing happens

that just means it could've been worse

it could've been a disaster

it could've been bad news

sometimes when nothing happens

means there's nothing you can lose

sometimes when you're left waiting

that means trouble could've come

right up to your doorstep

leaving a trail of crumbs

absence can be a virtue

it doesn't leave you in the night

sometimes when nothing happens

everything is still all right

          don't be dismayed

          by things that never appear

          just when you think you're farther

          doesn't mean that you're not near

sometimes life passes you by

and leaves you stranded in its dust

just take a look inside you

there might be someone you can trust

never mind the disappointment

it's true you will find a way

sometimes when nothing happens

everything will be okay

          

the sound of your voice

I hear millions of words everyday

but I don't pay attention to what they say

they all go in one ear

and out the other

people talk and make conversation

sometimes for work, sometimes recreation

every word is a planet

waiting to be discovered

but all the words you say to me

get caught up in my memory

I don't forget 

a single word you say

every hello, every goodbye

is a time for me to question why

you decided to talk to me today

          am I good enough for you?

          can you tell me what to do?

          I try, but I have no choice

          except to listen 

          to the sound of your voice

I hear so many words from you

informing me of what I'm going through

they echo in my brain

and rattle inside my head

I know that they could disappear

and leave me with a mind so clear

but I think

I'd rather have your words instead

          am I good enough for you?

          can you tell me what to do?

          I try, but I have no choice

          except to listen 

          to the sound of your voice

night train to Kalamazoo

I've had my share

of beer and tobacco

but since you're offering

don't mind if I do

I can't sleep on cocaine

and wine makes me wacko

and I'm on the night train

to Kalamazoo

give me good conversation

and a bottle of whiskey

I'll tell you my life story

every bit of it's true

but it is an adventure

everything was risky

now I'm on the night train

to Kalamazoo

do yourself a favor, son

find a girl and settle down

don't do what

ambition made me do

working as a salesman

moving on from town to town

now I'm riding on the night train

to Kalamazoo

well, this is my stop, boy

from here I'll take a cab

hole up in a motel room

and sleep the whole night through

order a few drinks

company pays the tab

it's better than riding the night train

to Kalamazoo

emotional weather

the clouds are moving in today

exactly how it should be

because sunshine and daisies

they mean nothing to me

gray skies and hiding in ponchos

are more of what is mine

in my emotional weather

it's raining all the time

I have no use for summer

and all the summer things it owns

I stay inside my apartment

and I'm always right at home

I keep the curtains drawn

my TV lights up the room

in my emotional weather

it's always doom and gloom

          I've seen blue skies

          and I think they're overrated

          darkness will fill my eyes

          with the depression I've created

I hope one day to go outside

and participate in life

my world of pain and self-pity

is not one that I like

I know the world is sad now

it's strangled and it's strange

but in my emotional weather

it's time for a change

I am not nervous now

I am not nervous now

life is treating me okay

I am not nervous now

for once I am not afraid

I'm not concerned

with tomorrow's news

and old memories

make me confused

I have the right-of-way

I am not nervous today

I don't feel sad today

I'm living in the here and now

I've tried to get there before

but I couldn't figure out how

I don't know why

but everything is working

I don't have to cry

and I've forgot all the hurting

I'm not what I was the day before

I don't feel sad anymore

          I am not thinking

          that my luck will last forever

          but I'm not running away

          I've got a new endeavor

give me just a little time

and I figure it all out

I'll find my answers deep inside

and know what it's all about

and I know perhaps tomorrow

things won't be as okay

as I'm feeling at this moment

at this time right here today

I can take on what life allows

I am not nervous now

everything depends on you

I am searching for words to tell you

exactly what I feel

I remember love so deep inside

but I don't know if it's real

every stolen moment in my memory

they all belong to you

you've got me whole

my heart and soul

what more can I do?

          it's true

          I've been worrying the whole night through

          it's true

          everything depends on you

I don't know if you'll ignore me

or if you'll pay attention

maybe you'll care about my heart

and change my life's direction

I've been waiting all my life

for you to come to me

you're who I need

yes indeed

you could set me free

          it's true

          I've been worrying the whole night through

          it's true

          everything depends on you

          maybe you'll take my defenses

          and hide them away

          I've got no more pretenses

          as long as you will stay

I am searching for words to ask you

do you think I have a chance

do you think you would care for me

in this circumstance

if you don't answer me

I'll only ask you again

the answer is here

in the atmosphere

it's a chance for us to win

          it's true

          I've been worrying the whole night through

          it's true

          everything depends on you

you

I've been running

I've been hiding

I've been doing everything

but deciding

where I'm going

I don't know

but it's time for me to go

give me a reason

to keep believing

in you

I've been hoping

I've been praying

but all my sweet dreams

are decaying

where I'm going

I can't say

but I'm leaving here today

give me an answer

is there a chance here

with you

          there's no denying

          I keep on trying

          to steer your heart towards mine

          I'm always searching

          I've been rehearsing

          for the love I know I'll find

drop your defenses

I'll drop mine too

just think of the many things

that we can do

I'll be yours

you'll be mine

we can be 

each other's valentine

I will confess now

I'll just say yes now

to you

I have been

I have been asking questions

for all my life

but none of the answers ever

turn out right

so I'll stop being curious

you know that I'm serious

I'll accept every comment I see

except those having to do with me

'

I have been looking for

my peace of mind

it seems to have gone missing

peace I cannot find

so I will quit my search

I am going to quench my thirst

for unbroken stability

I need to take care of me

I have been walking these sidewalks

since who knows when

I've done it over and over

and I'm doing it again

but right now it's ending

there's no use in pretending

that there's more than I can see

it's got something to do with me

I have been asking questions

for all of my days

I try to make a clean landing

but I won't get out of my way

but I will keep trying

there is no denying

all the things that I could be

with the possible exception of me

all those thoughts

all those thoughts

that I'm ashamed about

spend all day going in

spend all day going out

they overtake me

in the weakest of times

and they leave

a crumbled mess behind

but they don't understand

that they're not

who I am

all those thoughts

I let surround me

all the lives

of all around me

I don't know what's real

i don't know what's false

all I know is 

that it's all my fault

my thoughts have the upper hand

but they're not 

who I am

all these thoughts

that I let inside

leave me without

a place to hide

but still I fight back

it's all I know how to do

I want to live

a life that's true

maybe it's all just a circumstance

but that don't make me

who I am

concerning you

I don't have a reason

I don't have a clue

I don't know how I feel

concerning you

it's been a long, long journey

farther than a mile

but I can't stop thinking

about the way you smile

I know you're going to break

my weary heart in two

but I know that's how it goes

concerning you

I've noticed all the warnings

but they don't do any good

it stops me from doing everything

that I know I should

I'm reliving all the panic

that you have put me through

everything is tragic

when it's concerning you

but I will not listen

to the logic in my mind

with you I'm always leaving

my common sense behind

so here I go, head first,

my heart will follow soon

that's the way my life reacts

concerning you

I've gone through my emotions

and what I say and do

but this is what my life looks like

concerning you

everybody needs me

everybody needs me

so they can complain

they need me to listen

so they can remain

angry and bitter

that all is so wrong

and they feel they must

pass it along

it does them no good

to keep to themselves

they must give their disease

to somebody else

and that someone is me

oh, I listen so well

I must be that person

to whom they can tell

          all the bad news to

          everything that's gone bad

          I'm so anxious now

          but I don't feel sad

instead I am angry

that they treat me this way

like I'm just a person

with nothing to say

I serve just to listen to them

moan and complain

and when they are finished

they start all over again

and me, I just sit here

helpless and bored

I think of everything

that's being ignored

one of these days

I'll get off of the phone

and begin to live

in a peaceful home

factory town

look at me

I'm trying to be

the best I really can

so I can hold the audience

in the palm of my hand

I've acted since I was a boy

now I'm a full grown man

now I am unforgiving

and I don't give a damn

mess with me

and you will see

how much I show and tell

in a factory town called L.A.

it's always buy and sell

the money buys the power

and the power buys the art

this is not a place to live in

if you've got half a heart

I belong to you

I've got the windows closed

the shades are drawn

and nobody else

for depending on

what can I do

I belong to you

I drink every day

I drink every night

I say my prayers

by candlelight

this, I swear, is true

I belong to you

I know the problem

you let me down

and now my brain's

a-spinning 'round

I don't have a clue

i belong to you

it don't take no brains

for me to see

everyone knows you

were made for me

twenty-three skidoo

I belong to you

          take me

          shake me

          make me your very own

          I know

          I'm going 

          in the danger zone

I wait for you

but you ain't here yet

I think I'll take up

cigarettes

my love for you is overdue

I belong to you

come back, love,

and let me in

I'm waiting for heaven

to begin

you're who I must pursue

I belong to you

ceiling fan

I watch the ceiling fan

as I lie in bed

trying hard to not think

of the day that lies ahead

sleep, won't you take me

to another time

where I don't think about

the girl who left me behind

I let the ceiling fan

push the air around

I lie there, still as silence,

I don't make a sound

and try not to listen

to the thoughts in my mind

because they remind me

of the girl who left me behind

          but I can't help it

          the voices in my brain

          just keep on repeating

          the reasons for my pain

I look at the ceiling fan

continuing to spin

confirming with each movement

the shape that I am in

I know someday I'll be okay

I'm still looking for a sign

all I can think of

is the girl who left me behind

oh Martha

I want to sleep like a cat

in the middle of the day

instead of working

my whole life away

oh Martha

you know it just ain't right

I've got a nose for news

and two left feet

and a story of life

that's incomplete

oh Martha

whatcha doing tonight

          oh Martha

          will you be true

          oh Martha

          everything depends on you

I howl like a dog

I'm stubborn as a mule

if I were any smarter

I'da stayed in school

oh Martha

tell me you'll be mine

I need you like

tumbleweeds need sun

I'll be there for you

when the working day's done

oh Martha

please be my valentine

          oh Martha...

        

I've got twenty dollars

and a six pack of beer

and a car to get

to there from here

oh Martha

let me into your heart

everyone tells me

I'm a crying shame

but you and I know

I'm not to blame

oh Martha

you're a work of art

          oh Martha...

          

way back when

when the sun rises

and the world turns to blue

that's when I 

think of you

in the early morning

before the day begins

I remember

way back when

          you and me

          we were free

          we were young

          with so many songs

          yet to be sung

when the moon comes up

and stars light up the sky

that's when I think

of days gone by

when the breezes blow

and I need a friend 

I remember

way back when 

          you and me

          we were free

          we were young

          with so many songs

          yet to be sung

when the sun rises

and another day starts

that's when I feel

my broken heart

when I think it's over

it comes around again

I remember

way back when

I remember (rewrite 1)

I am an old man

all I do is sit around

I watch the TV

I turn up the sound

my hearing is shot

my bones, they ache

and sometimes I feel like

it was all a mistake

but I'm still alive

a last dying ember

and I remember

I don't walk so good now

I must use a cane

I still get around

but it isn't the same

I used to explore

when I was a kid

Lord, when I think of

the things that I did

when I was still young

and time was tender

I remember

          I remember those days

          of being a child

          I was never afraid

          and my daydreams grew wild

          I remember those days

          a young man I was

          I knew what it felt like

          to be in love

now I'm here for

my remainder of days

alive on medications

in a chemical haze

I live in this home

and they treat me okay

but what I would give

for my younger days

now time's almost gone

and I must surrender

but I remember

so I can feel human again

I would like a winter wind

right about now

maybe the sun could be worse

but I don't know how

it's summer

it's August

and it's hotter than hell

take me back to the season

that I know so well

          I want a good cold breeze

          making goosebumps on my skin

          I'm waiting for summer to finish

          so I can feel human again

I would like another job

that doesn't steal my soul

I'd like the loss of my prick boss

who wants constant control

it's a living

unforgiving

it takes too much of my time

please give me the freedom

I once thought was mine

          I want to live my life

          where time can be my friend

          I'm waiting for retirement

          so I can feel human again

I would like someone to hold

through these endless nights

someone to take my loneliness

and hide it out of sight

being alone

is a danger zone

it's the place where I survive

I need to find somebody

with whom I can live my life

          I want to have a hand to hold

          a love that I can win

          I need you beside me

          so I can feel human again

this coffee cup beside me

this coffee cup beside me

is my best friend

it began the morning after

and it starts my aching head

it provides me constant comfort

and the warmth that I desire

locked in an air-conditioned building

while the flames rise higher

          this coffee cup beside me

          will warm me up again

          that's why the coffee cup beside me 

          is my best friend

the coffee cup beside me

has seen the starts of many days

each one a new beginning

that somehow lost its way

it's seen me at my best

and it's been here for the worst

never knowing if this living

is a blessing or a curse

          this coffee cup beside me

          will warm me up again

          that's why the coffee cup beside me 

          is my best friend

the coffee cup beside me

does great at what it has to do

it has one job and does it well

and rests when day is through

I'll wash it and reuse it

every single waking day

the coffee cup beside me

made from a lump of clay

          this coffee cup beside me

          will warm me up again

          that's why the coffee cup beside me 

          is my best friend

          

I remember

I am an old man

all I do is sit around

I watch the TV

I turn up the sound

my hearing is shot

my bones, they ache

and sometimes I think

it was all a mistake

but I'm still alive

a last dying ember

and I remember

I don't walk so good now

I must use a cane

I still get around

but it isn't the same

I used to explore

when I was a kid

Lord, when I think of

the things that I did

from the middle of June

to the start of September

I remember

          I remember those days

          of being a child

          I was never afraid

          and my daydreams grew wild

          I remember those days

          a young man I was

          I knew what it felt like

          to fall in love

I once had a wife

and kids numbered four

now my darling's in heaven

I hardly see the kids anymore

I sit in a home

and they treat me okay

but what I would give

for my younger days

back when time was tender

I remember

now I am here for

my remainder of days

I live on medications

in a chemical haze

but I am not sorry

for the life that I've led

I just wish it weren't ending

in a hospital bed

now it's my time to surrender

but I remember

youth and money

I've got everything I need 

except youth and money

you might think it's funny

but that's the score

I've got peace of mind

and local honey

but youth and money

I just want more and more

I remember old days

playing poker in the den

wish it would be again

I would be so rich

now I am an old man

I do what I'm told

but, man, this growing old

is a son of a bitch

I've got everything I want

except youth and money

days used to be sunny

now they're cloudy and gray

my energy is fading

and my eggs are all runny

they sit in my tummy

till the end of the day

I remember old days

everything was classic

days made of elastic

that's when I was young

now I am an old man

I'm not much of a talker

I use a cane and walker

and my songs have all been sung

I've got everything I need

except youth and money

now let me tell you, sonny

old age has arrived

I'm like Brando in the 50s

I coulda been somebody

I could have youth and money

but at least I'm alive

let me sleep

 

let me sleep

let me fully be at rest

let me sleep

that's when I behave the best

I want to dream the dreams

that have learned to hide

the ones that keep

so much inside

I need slumber that is deep

let me sleep

I'm so tired

of this being awake

I don't know

how much more I can take

I've found the conscious life

is not for me

I need a life

of pure serenity

I'm through with counting sheep

let me sleep

          I want to live my life

          as a sleepy head

          it's just so more interesting

          when I stay in bed

let me sleep

my waking life is boring

let me sleep

I want to do some snoring

and then I'll wake

and I'll be all right

once I have slept

the entire night

in slumber I will keep

let me sleep

bridges

think I'll burn a few bridges

think I'll start with you

I don't want to see your face

after all you've put me through

I've learned my lesson now

and I know just what to do

think I'll burn a few bridges

think I'll start with you

there's no use in hanging around

I've made up my mind

I'm heading out for the rest of my life

and I'm leaving you behind

I don't know what lies ahead

I don't know what I'll find

all I know is the end is near

and I believe it's well past time

          don't try to make me

          don't try to shake me

          to my senses I've returned

          I won't look for you

          I will ignore you

          there's so much that I have learned

like the way that you cheated

the times that you lied

the moments you used me

and cast me aside

but I have grown stronger

I've had to decide

that my own self esteem

will not be denied

so I'll burn a few bridges

think I'll start with you

I don't want to see your face

after all you've put me through

I've learned my lesson now

and I know just what to do

think I'll burn a few bridges

think I'll start with you

think I'll burn a few bridges

think I'll start with you

tell me I'm okay

tell me I'm okay

even if you have to lie

because the fact is I

will believe every word you say

tell me I'm all right

even though it isn't true

I need to hear it from you

please don't be quiet

          I don't believe 

          anything

          that I tell myself

          I'm so disturbed

          I need the words

          to come from someone else

tell me I am good

even though you're wrong

I need to feel I belong

like I'm in your neighborhood

tell me I exist

even if you don't want me

my words come around to haunt me

my hands turn into fists

          I don't believe 

          anything

          that I tell myself

          I'm so disturbed

          I need the words

          to come from someone else

tell me I'll survive

even if you think I can't

that is just my circumstance

that's how I live my life

I need to know today

I'm desperate and I'm sad

I've never hurt this bad

don't let me waste away

tell me I'm okay

the chosen one

it's been a long, long while

since you've seen the stars

shining through the pines

like they have been before time

constellations glow

some are nearer

some are far

none are left behind

who knows what they find

you are a human

on this planet you are stuck

but every single soaring star

is wishing you good luck

          what are you doing here

          below the atmosphere

          are you having fun

          millions of years go by

          God only knows how fast they fly

          farther than the sun

          there's billions of people

          but you are the chosen one

it's been a long, long while

since you've dreamed your dreams

you're learning how to cope

but still you give up hope

but not everything

is exactly what it seems

you've still got a ways to go

before you find your home

you are a human

you're going to be okay

every bright and shining star

will lead you on your way

          what are you doing here

          below the atmosphere

          are you having fun

          millions of years go by

          God only knows how fast they fly

          farther than the sun

          there's billions of people

          but you are the chosen one

          you are the chosen one

          

 

my habit

my plans each day 

revolve around you

my schedule depends 

on whatever you do

you prey daily upon

my tortured mind

but my habit doesn't

care about time

it doesn't care about your body

your spirit or your soul

my habit only wants

complete control

so I keep using

even though it's no good

I cannot quit

even though I should

          there must be a way

          to salvage my brain

          my habit has got me

          and I know I'm to blame

I know that I can't

take good care of myself

I know there are ways

to get me some help

but I will not listen

to someone diagnose

all I do is wait

for the very next dose

          there must be a way

          to salvage my brain

          my habit has got me

          and I know I'm to blame

everyday I think

I'm going to try

but by the end of the day

hope has passed me by

I've begged for forgiveness

I've been down on my knees

but I am enslaved

to this wretched disease

          there must be a way

          to salvage my brain

          addiction has got me          

          and I know I'm to blame        

you do it anyway

plastic jars in the medicine chest

plastic boxes with days of the week

put the pills in order

make sure they're complete

one box for every morning

one box for late at night

your marvelous medications

hopefully you'll feel all right

push-ups in the living room

stationary bike in the den

you've got the best intentions

but you won't do those things again

maybe a walk around the block

maybe some water for your thirst

maybe healthy food and exercise

you can't tell which is worse

          these are things you do everyday

          to keep future problems away

          your laziness is here to stay

          but you do it anyway

          you do it anyway

meditation in the morning

protein shake approaching noon

therapy happens every Thursday

hopefully your mind has lots of room

try again to find some friends and lovers

companionship is exactly what you need

but you still end up feeling lonesome

still you think you might one day succeed

          these are things you do everyday

          to keep future problems away

          your laziness is here to stay

          but you do it anyway

          you do it anyway

sometimes you think you're making progress 

but those days are few and far between

most times you think you're doing nothing

don't it make you want to shout and scream

but all it takes is some persistence

a strong belief to never stop

if you keep doing what you're doing

soon you'll be way up at the top

          these are things you do everyday

          to keep future problems away

          your laziness is here to stay

          but you do it anyway

          you do it anyway

I slept late today

I slept late today

there was no reason to get up

sadness is here to stay

like somehow I don't get enough

so I lay there in bed

waiting for good news to appear

good news ignored me instead

while bad news found me here

          I gotta get up

          I need to get up and move

          but I lie here instead

          thinking there's nothing to prove

I slept late today

the blankets were holding me down

I tried to disobey

but my sleep kept bossing me around

so I lay there in bed

wishing I had energy to spare

but I had dreams in my head

and their power caught me unaware

          I gotta get up

          I'm wasting daylight all day long

          but I lie here instead

          knowing my actions are all wrong

I slept late today

I'll probably do the same tomorrow

I've got no one to blame

just this never ending sorrow

so I lay there in bed

a victim of this petty crime

I may be full of dread

but soon I know I will get up in time

          I gotta get up

          this sadness is just not okay

          but I lie here instead

          knowing there must be a better way

          because I need to get up

          today

          

guess this is how life goes

nothing ever turns out 

how it's supposed to

it's written in the stars 

it must go wrong

every dream

is getting close to dying

this is how 

human beings get along

damn this life

damn my stupid plans

how it all goes bad

I don't understand

there is nothing that I know

guess this is how life goes

meet a good person

fall in love

she breaks up with you

'cause you are not enough

find a brand new job

so good it makes you shout

that means you'll be let go

before the week is out

damn this life

damn my stone hard luck

you give to life

but life doesn't give a fuck

the saying is wrong

you don't reap what you sow

guess this is how life goes

          another disappointment

          add it to the rest

          nothing ever happens

          when you try your best

just when you need a favor

life hands you its worst

I don't know if being alive

is a blessing or a curse

everything turns out wrong

that's the way it seems

open up the garbage can

and throw in all your dreams

damn this life

damn my trusting soul

I don't have much hope

and I sure don't have control

and bad luck is all I can show

guess this is how life goes

someone else's house

I am staying 

at someone else's house

it is not familiar to me

I'm keeping things clean

quiet as a mouse

there's not much for you to see

I feel so strange

it looks so new

and there's no work

for me to do

but that's okay

I'll figure it out

here at someone else's house

why am I here?

I'm sure you'd like to know

I'm taking care of the place

while its folks

on vacation they did go

tourist smiles on their face

I do this

and I do that

litter boxes

for the cats

while they're gone

my friend and his spouse

I'm at someone else's house

I should throw a party

do something fun

but I don't know what to do

watch some TV

lunch has begun

kick off both my shoes

for two weeks

this will be my new home

I'll get some work done

I'll spend some time alone

that's what housesitting

is all about

here at someone else's house

here at someone else's house