light of day

 

I think too much and that's my problem/ my brain is working overtime/ too many thoughts and my life surrounds them/ I've got a sad and troubled mind/ let me feel the autumn wind/ let me feel the warmth of the sun/ don't make me go back again/ I have left too much undone

(chorus) take me with you when you go/ this life's the only one I know/ come and take me far away/ where I can see the light of day

he works the day away

 

he does a lot/ but he never talks/ he works the day away/ like there's nothing else to do/ if he's hurting/ he keeps on working/ he works the day away/ to get his mind off you/ so do him a favor/ don't call him on the phone/ stay away from places/ where you used to go/ he doesn't need to hear/ anything you have to say/ he works the day away

born without a heart

 

call the doctor/ emergency/ there's something wrong/ inside of me/ maybe you can look and see/ what's tearing me apart/ I try to be in love, but yet/ love is something I forget/ I know I should not be upset/ but I don't know how to start/ I was born without a heart

I'm always cursing my bad luck/ problem is, I know I'm stuck/ on the ground and looking up/ it's turned into a work of art/ I don't feel and I don't know why/ I cannot laugh and I cannot cry/ all is a mistake and I'm/ stumbling in the dark/ I was born without a heart

(bridge) I have two legs and an open mind/ but that's not what I hoped to find

call somebody/ 911/ I want my sadness to be done/ this way I live ain't any fun/ I need a running start/ so I can catch up to you/ you take away all of my blues/ someone tell me what to do/ I was born without a heart/ I was born without a heart 

I'm very thankful to be around family

Thanksgiving was a good day. I went to my brother's house and his wife and her mother made a wonderful meal. And for once, I didn't eat too much. I didn't have to feel that bloating feeling you get when you eat too much. It was sure tempting because everything was so good. 

That sounds very nice, farmboy. This being such a weird year and all, I'm just glad you didn't spend it by yourself, eating boxed macaroni and cheese.

We had real macaroni and cheese! It was all so great. The best thing, of course, is that I didn't have to spend it by myself. With COVID and everything, I really treasure being with people I love. I feel bad for everybody who was alone. It's hard to spend holidays alone. I know, I've done it. It's more than just a drag. It feels horrible, and I'm very thankful I got to be around family.

There's a lot to be thankful for this year. Everything seems more under control now that Joe Biden and Kamala Harris were elected, and vaccines for COVID are finally in sight. I have few financial and health problems and I have a guitar and the ability to play music. And I have you to talk to.

Ah, shucks.

I'm serious. It really helps to have somebody to talk to. It means the world to me. 

So, this year...with everything that has gone wrong, it's really great to see the changes that, hopefully, will be happening. What a relief. I am very thankful for the changes, and for the holiday. It was a good one.

my untrusted friend

 

so you're back again/ my untrusted friend/ spreading your disease in my life/ I thought you'd go/ what do I know/ you're back again tonight/ your name is trouble/ I know that now/ but I'm gonna make it through/ somehow/ but you make it hard/ for me to be myself/ I search for clues, and patterns, too/ a science that's named after you/ why don't you go after someone else

I tried to write you

I tried to write you/ but it did not work/ I tried my best/ to manage the hurt/ but I ran out of luck/ I cried "what the fuck"/ but still you would not read it/ love betrays you every time/ especially if you need it/ can you show me what to do/ when a fool's in love with you/  I wait every night to/ hear you calling me

nothing on my mind

 

nothing on my mind/ except the ones I leave behind/ innocent as the day you were born/ you'll be where I was/ if they ask you, just because/ is the answer that they will not ignore/ save me, friends, for I am lost/ the price I pay is worth the cost/ I will not be denied my existence/ this is how my life begins/ with the world learning how to spin/ I have nothing, if not persistence

nothing in my mind/ except the dreams I leave behind/ broken down and unfulfilled/ as I continue on/ I ask: where has hope gone?/ last time I looked, it was around here still/ there are visions yet to see/ but they will not come to me/ they lie around, unused/ I am standing on the street/ eyes downward in defeat/ it's no wonder I'm confused

I used to be young (rewrite 4)

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it may be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ I always believed/ that tomorrow was coming/ there always was something/ else to do/ but now those days have gone/ and I swiftly have moved on/ to the winter of my years/ someday you'll be like me/ and all that you see/ will someday disappear

 I was once like you/ I took it all for granted/ I tried to understand it/ but I failed/ the world in my heart/ spoke through me like thunder/ I was left to wonder/ what would prevail/ but you, you hold my hope/ like you're a telescope/ viewing stars that I used to see/ I'm praying everyday/ that you don't turn out this way/ you don't need the sadness/ that is me

hanging around

 

I am hanging around/ waiting for something to begin/ anything, anything/ I can't be silent again/ there must be something in my brain/ that needs to be brought out/ I know it's in there somewhere/ whatever it is all about/ hear me, world, here I am/ you've been waiting just for me/ I have words and I have stories/ all of which belong to me

I am a thief

 

I took a walk around the neighborhood/ I was up to no damn good/ casing people's houses/ sizing up the cars/ looking for my fortune/ I need not go far/ everything's here/ and I'm standing near/what sweet relief/ I am a thief

you see me but you cannot tell/ that I will turn your life to hell/ all your belongings/ do I crave/ and I do love/ to misbehave/ let's see what's on top/ and what's underneath/ I am a thief

(bridge) try to protect yourselves/ it won't do any good/ in my dreams, I'm the king/ of your neighborhood

everything belongs to me/ as far as my eyes can see/ your computers and/ your TV screen/ this is my choice/ I'm a machine/ I can cause you untold grief/ I am a thief

famous

 

you need to be famous/ I can smell it on you/ dangling from off the hook/ you need too be famous/ I see it in you/ puppy dog eyes with a come-hither look/ why do you need the attention/ of people you do not know/ I know they're your best intensions/ and they keep you from being alone

wonder in the wind

 

I have the painting you gave me/ with waves breaking on the shore/ of western Ireland/ I went there once before/ in happier days/ days of wonder in the wind/ if I could, you know/ I would go back again/ to stare at the sky/ and know that I/ can feel free

I know the sailor's songs/ they push me onward, it's true/ they echo in my memory/ a world I never knew/ give me imagination/ tell me who I am/ let me believe in anything/ I know well that I can/ stare into the sea/ and know that I/ can feel free

meet me at the station

 

meet me at the station/ hurry, don't delay/ this is the last time I'll see you/ I'm going away/ don't forget about me/ now and then I'll cross your mind/ when you're searching through your memory/ I hope I'm the one you find

(chorus) please don't treat me like a stranger/ that's the cruelest thing to do/ being with you was such sweet danger/ and that's why I'm in love with you

there's supposed to be a miracle

 

there's supposed to be a miracle/ in the darkness of your eyes/ you think nobody sees it/ but I do/ you look in the mirror/ and it comes as a surprise/ but it's true/ all those people told you/ in your history/ that you mean nothing in the end/ but me, I look at you/ I see your mystery/ and I thank God/ that's you're my friend

all the mistakes that I have made

 

all the mistakes that I have made/ have added up together/ to make me the man I am/ for worse or for better/ and I have made so many mistakes/ a whole lot more than just a few/ but the worst were the mistakes/ I made with you

(chorus) please forgive me/ don't ignore me/ this is my side/ of the story/ I'm the one who should have won your heart/ please forgive/ don't ignore me/ I've got the facts laid out before me/ you know we should never be apart

all the wishes I have made/ don't add up to anything/ they just leave me here alone/ to see what problems they can bring/ and I have wished upon a star/ for me to have the love of you/ but no matter where I( am/ those wishes never do some true

(chorus) please forgive me/ don't ignore me/ this is my side/ of the story/ I'm the one who should have won your heart/ please forgive/ don't ignore me/ I've got the facts laid out before me/ you know we should never be apart

Like a fuckin' machine

I am so fuckin' angry right now I don't know what to do. I just took a Klonopin and maybe that will work, but it would surprise me. Nothing ever works. I've smoked so much weed in my life that it barely affects me anymore. Klonopin barely works most of the time. I'm never tired and it's hard to go to sleep. And there's nothing to fuckin' do...We're in this fuckin' pandemic and it's supposed to get worse. I'm lonely and I'm bored and I'm angry. All I ever do is play the same songs day in and day out and I'm tired of being someone who only practices, who never performs, who never gets any attention for my work. And playing is frustrating. I never get any better and I always feel like a fuckin' amateur. I can never eat anything but I never lose weight. So it's denying myself all the time of anything. I am so depressed every day that I just take it for granted that I'm always depressed. I can't catch a fuckin' break. There is nobody around to be with, and I can't be with them anyway because of the fuckin' pandemic. I want to say, please, please help me to get high or feel some joy...make something fuckin' happen! I feel like I can't take another day of this shit. Everything, all the songs I've been writing lately don't work and I'm so fuckin' tired of these songs that I've been playing everyday for I don't know how long now. Something someday has to happen. It has to happen. It's rainy and miserable outside so I can't go for a walk. It's been almost two weeks since I';ve gone grocery shopping and I'm running out of things. I want to go to Trader Joe's but it's raining and it would take two busses and for some reason my brother doesn't seem to go there anymore. Last time he went he only gave me a half-hour warning and I missed it, and he hasn't gone since. I'm so fuckin' tired of eating eggs and tortillas when I get to let myself eat like a normal person. I'm so fuckin' tired of all this shit never changing. Nothing ever changes, no matter how I try. And I try. Every fuckin' day, like a fuckin' machine, but nothing ever happens. Nothing ever happens. I don't get therapy every week anymore because my insurance has changed and I can't afford it. I just stay in this apartment and stay frustrated all the fuckin' time, and there's no end to this, there's no end to this. Something needs to change, but it won't. It won't change.

jukebox romeo

 

will you dance with me/ I'm so tired of being alone/ when I look at you/ I feel like I've come home/ you look to me/ like someone I should know/ I could be your/ jukebox romeo

will you dance with me/ join me on the gym room floor/ you got everything I need/ I don't want any more/ put your arms around me/ dance real smooth and slow/ I could be your/ jukebox romeo

(bridge) sometimes I wish/ I had nothing to do/ but stay here on the sidelines/ and look at you

will you dance with me/ you know, it could be fun/ on my hit parade of lovers/ you could be number one/ if you plan on leaving/ I still want to go/ I could be your/ jukebox romeo

committing

 

I'm committing myself to you/ everything I do/ I'd give the world if you would be with me/ please don't take these words lightly/ Heaven knows, it might be/ the only way to set those feelings free/    if you accept me/ I will do the best I can/ to make you proud of me/ and everything I am/ I can't rest until I know it's true/ I'm committing myself to you

you are all I dream about/ the one I can't live without/ what can I do to make you see/ I would climb the highest mountain/ I've spent my life counting/ the days till you're with me/ if you allow me/ I'll share my love with you/ if you're not with me/ no one else would do/ walking down the avenue/ I'm committing myself to you

I used to be young (rewrite 3)

 

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it may be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ I always took for granted/ that tomorrow was coming/ there always was something/ else to do/ but now those days have gone/ and I swiftly have moved on/ to the winter of my years/ someday you'll be like me/ and all that you see/ will someday disappear

I used to feel free/ but the joy of being alive/ vanished before my eyes/ I was just like you/ time went so fast/  in the single blink of an eye/ all those years flew by/ I never knew/ for me those times have passed/ and I am here at last/ with my body shifting gears/ someday you'll be like me/ and then, my friend, you'll see/ how quickly we all disappear

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it may be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ but it's true

no words

 

I have no words/ everything I say has been said before/ I'm so disturbed/ I always thought that there would be so much more/ I'll find my way out of the mountains/ I'll hike to the deep blue sea/ it's been so many days and counting/ there must be a way back to me

Thank God

 

I'm so frustrated, so tired, so bored. But at least Joe Biden and Kamala Harris won the election. Thank God. Maybe we can get to some kind of normality in the government. I look at all the fuckin' chaos over the past four years. It's gonna take a lot of work to move past that, but I'm confident that we can.

I'm glad you're glad, farmboy. I'm glad, too. Now what are you so frustrated?

Oh, I'm just tired of having to make it through every day with this fuckin' pandemic going on. It's gloomy and cold outside, and I haven't walked for a couple of days. But I'm still very happy about the election, and I can't forget that.

It's good to be grateful.

Yeah, that's what I am. Can't forget that.

I used to be young (rewrite 2)

 

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it may be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ I always believed/ that tomorrow was coming/ there always was something/ else to do/ but now those days have gone/ and I quickly have moved on/ to the winter of my years/ someday you'll be like me/ and all that you see/ will someday disappear

I used to feel free/ but the joy of being alive/ vanished before my eyes/ and left me blue/ time went so fast/  in the single blink of an eye/ all those years flew by/ I never knew/ now take a look at me/ and all you will see/ are shades of gray growing in my beard/ someday you will be old/ days are short and nights are cold/ memories disappear

I once knew youth/ a long, long time ago/ a time I used to know/ I was just like you/ you stand in my footsteps/ ignoring tomorrow/ time is only ours to borrow/ sad but true/ for me those times have passed/ and I am here at last/ with my body shifting gears/ someday you'll be like me/ and then, my friend, you'll see/ how quickly we all disappear

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it may be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ but it's true

day off

 

just what would happen/ if you took today off/ from everything/ that you have to do/ would you have a good time/ or would you be bored/ waiting for the day/ to completely be through/ I don't know, but I'm gonna try/ the day will pass in the blink of an eye/ and everything is going to be fine/ it's no big deal/ it's just what I feel/ taking the day off/ could be good for me

but it's true

after all you've been through/ after all you've done/ did you ever think/ maybe you weren't the one/ who was made for love/ in an uncertain land/ it's not up to you/ to understand

personally, I think you're wrong/ and I've heard enough/ from everything I've seen/ you are not unloved/ there are many people/ who think the world of you/ you probably don't believe it/ but it's true

remember

 

remember how it used to me?/ yeah, I don't remember, either/ I've spent too long in the here and now/ I believe it's time for a breather/ take me back when life was simple/ even if it never was/ back when you could ask a question/ and the answer was "because"

remember how it used to be?/ that was a long time ago/ all those memories still exist/ but exactly where/ I do not know/ take me back when I was young/ and the world has promise/ now all I see is crime to me/ human beings being dishonest

I am waiting

 

I am waiting/ for the results to come in/ I am waiting/ to see if we're gonna win/ come on, voters/ do what needs to be done/ I won't be satisfied/ till I'm sure that we've won/ it's coming down to the wire/ and soon we will know/ just what the country's made of/ just how far we can go/ help me be optimistic/ let me know we can win/ let the new president and his running mate/ begin

I used to be young (rewrite 1)

 

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it might be hard to conceive it/ but it's true/ I always had hope/ that tomorrow was coming/ there always was something/ fun to do/ but now those days have gone/ and I have quickly moved on/ to the winter of my years/ someday you'll be like me/ and all that you see/ will someday disappear/ you will not be here

I used to feel excitement/ but the joy of being alive/ vanished before my eyes/ and left me blue/ time went so fast/ all those years flew by/ in the single blink of an eye/ I never knew/ now take a look at me/ and all you will see/ are shades of gray in my beard/ someday you will be old/ days are short and nights are cold/ memories disappear/ you will not be here

(bridge) youth is wasted on the young/ I've heard that old cliche/ tears taste bitter on the tongue/ when it's almost time/ to go away

I used to be young/ a long, long time ago/ a time I used to know/ I was just like you/ you stand in my footsteps/ ignoring tomorrow/ time is only ours to borrow/ sad but true/ for me those days have passed/ and I am here at last/ with my last breath shifting gears/ someday you'll be like me/ and then, my friend, you'll see/ how quickly we all disappear/ you will not be here/ you will not be here

I used to be young

 

I used to be young/ I know you don't believe it/ it might be hard to conceive it/ but I was free and healthy/ just like you/ I always had hope/ that tomorrow was coming/ there always was something/ fun to do/ but now those days have gone/ and I have quickly moved on/ to the winter of my years/ someday you'll be like me/ and all that you will see/ will someday disappear/ you will not be here

I used to feel free/ but all I realized/ vanished before my eyes/ but I never noticed/ just like you/ time went so fast/ all those years flew by/ in the single blink of an eye/ no more chance of pulling through/ now take a look at me/ and all you will see/ are wrinkles and shades of gray/ you have no way of knowing/ but I'm at where you're going/ every day is one step near/ to the day when you are old/ days are short and nights are cold/ memories disappear/ you will not be here

(bridge) youth is wasted on the young/ I've heard that old cliche/ tears taste bitter on the tongue/ when it's almost time/ to go away

I used to be young/ a long, long time ago/ a time I used to know/ I was happy and hopeful/ just like you/ you stand in my footsteps/ measuring your talents/ not thinking about balance/ that's what I used to do/ but for me those days have passed/ and I am here at last/ with my last breath shifting gears/ someday you'll be like me/ you then, my friend, you'll see/ how quickly we all disappear/ there is nothing left to fear/ you will not be here

Election Day

 

are you holding on tight?/ election day is almost here/ the candidates are fighting/ the time is getting near/  hopefully there'll be change/ my message is sincere/ we need someone new to fill/ the next four years/ 'cause in America/ we're going to survive/ in America/ we vote to save our lives