Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Emotional stuff is hard work

It's been an exhausting day, man. The weather sucked, which is what it tends to do this time of year. 

Cold and wet.

And windy, out where I live. I swear, Belmont Street around Mount Tabor is a fuckin' wind tunnel.

Why are you exhausted, farmboy?

Went out today and had an intense session with my therapist. Then I went out in the gray and the cold and met with the teacher of this storytelling class I'm taking. And that was intense, too, because we're talking all about the fuckin' accident and was like a therapy session. He's a good teacher, though. You can tell that it's important to him that he does the best job he can.

So, anyway, dealing with all that emotional stuff...I know I sound like a fuckin' wimp, but that emotional stuff is hard work, man. I can't believe how hard. It's like songwriting can be sometimes.

You've been through a lot, farmboy. You've been through a traumatic event. You're working hard physically, and, if you don't mind me saying...

I don't.

I think you're still processing everything.

But it's been almost a year ago!

That doesn't matter, farmboy. This stuff takes time. And you're committed, you're putting in the work. You're making the effort. Look at yourself. Your focus on the problems is so strong that you're not able to see all that you're doing.

Oh, I see it.

For about five seconds. Then you move on. Whereas, is somebody says "boo!" to you you blow it all out of proportion and overanalyze it for a couple of days. At the least.

Basically, farmboy, you don't give yourself credit.

I know. I'm with you on that.

So start giving yourself credit.

I'll try. It's hard. This whole thing is hard.

I know, farmboy.

It's hard, but it's not impossible. I'm just being a little whiny bitch, aren't I?

I love how "bitch" is now a unisex word.

Yeah. Same with "dude." Words can be weird.

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