I'm the sum total

I'm the sum total
of many contradictions
it is no surprise

that I'm so fucked up
my mind has no idea
which way I'm going

what path for choosing
the time or date or season
is far beyond me

but still I'm trying
with my imagination
to win this battle

I just can't help it
maybe it's my destiny
I will never know

I'm only instinct
strength and muscle
bone and blood
I do what I can