Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Music and my place in it

Man, I can't fuckin' wait till the winter break. The five-day weekend just got me going, man. This new job is so fuckin' challenging...I can hardly wait till the day when it's all automatic. I miss the school where I used to work.

Okay, enough of that. Back to music.

That's right, farmboy. But you can always talk about your job if you want to.

Oh, I don't want to. To me, this is all about the music. Maybe someday I'll talk about other stuff, but right now it needs to be about music and my place in it. I don't understand why, but right now it's a need I have. I need every bit of encouragement I can get because right now I'm at an important time in my life.


Meaning that I can still make a life as a performing songwriter. I have the songs. I know that as a fact. I need to learn how to be a good performer...

You are a good performer, farmboy. I've heard you.

Thanks. But I'm still too unsure, I still suffer from this stupid worthless fuckin' lack of self-confidence. I mean, it's astounding to me how neurotic I am in that regard. It's fuckin' awful.

Something else to work on.

I've always worked on it. There's never been a time when I haven't had to work on it. Fuck.

But let's not talk about that stuff either, Let's focus on making the best album I can possibly make. Right now, that's what's important.

You're looking for focus?

Oh, I've got focus. Now I just gotta use it.

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