Tuesday, March 29, 2016

It's also not true

So, with the help of a stander, I stood for the first time today since the accident.

And how did that go, farmboy?

Hard, man. Fuckin' hard. Sometimes I feel like I'm never gonna walk again, and I don't want to think that, 'cause it's dangerous to think that. It's also not true. But, fuck, man, I started fuckin' crying, man. I am so fuckin' weak.

It's okay, farmboy. You've been through a lot and you've spent a lot of energy forcing yourself to be positive. Something like this was bound to happen sooner or later.

I haven't been that positive, man. I've gotten depressed and lonely a couple times.

You've basically gone through a traumatic experience, farmboy. Stop being so hard on yourself. You can't afford it right now. Give yourself a break and move on.

Yeah. I know that's what I'm gonna have to do. I gotta move on.

Tomorrow's another day. You're finished with the first time. You never have to do that again.

Well, that's a good thing. I hope I can sleep tonight. Tomorrow's waiting.

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