Here in the fuckin' present

I don't know what to say, man. I'm so fuckin' depressed, I'm so fuckin' sad, I'm so fuckin' angry, that it may not be a good thing for me to be conscious right now. Of course I have no weed. I think sleep is the only option.

I don't want to get overdramatic or fuckin' precious or anything, but I seem to have given up. And I'm sure that's temporary, but here in the fuckin' present everything sucks. I have no control,I'm having to choose between medication and food, and everybody just wants more money from me.

What about music, farmboy? Can you pick up a few dollars that way?

I fuckin' wish, man. I can't seem to do anything right, for the most part.

Am I self-pitying or what?

This seems different somehow...

Yeah, I don't know. Again, I don't need to be conscious, you know? I think being conscious is a huge mistake.

I'm sorry.

Why are you sorry, farmboy?

Because I'm poisoning you with the venom of my bitterness.

I'll survive.

I'm going to bed, man. Again, I'm sorry. Don't worry about me. There's just been too many bad days, too much bad news, way too much bad luck. I don't think thinking is gonna do much. I'm sorry.

Stop apologizing, farmboy.

You're a good person, man. I hate to subject you to...to...

To what, farmboy?

To me.

I'm going to bed now.