Sunday, January 9, 2011

Oxygen and water


you were eight years old
you were playing in the woods
by crawdad creek
when he saw you
and he grabbed you
and he ordered you
to neither move or speak
and he did things to you
that a small boy
can't begin to understand
and you're still keeping your secret
a child in the body of a man

skinned knees
torn jeans
blood on your sneakers
and your shirt
you looked just like a kid
who didn't know what he did
but got more than just his feelings hurt
he held you down on the ground
and he turned around
and keep the upper hand
and you're still keeping your secret
a child in the body of a man

now you are a grown-up
you're around the same age
that man was
way back then
but every night you have no choice
you feel his touch
and hear his voice
over and over
again and again
bedsheets soaked with sweat
but you never can forget
how he shook you
and he took you
under his command
and you're still keeping your secret
a child in the body of a man


Now, it's going to sound like I'm making excuses, but you've got to understand that this is a possible first draft. I mean, it's not really even a first draft yet. What I do many times is this kind of writing where I just get everything out and then I edit it later and put it to a melody if I don't already have one in my head. And I write a lot of free writing/first draft stuff that never gets past that first stage.

And this one, farmboy? I think it shows potential.

Thanks. But I don't know yet. I have to look at it and see if it still interests me, you know? I can see one possible issue: I offer no solution whatsoever and all I'm doing is reporting what happened. But that might really be all I can do. I'm not a therapist, I ain't no fuckin' social worker here.

But, basically, I don't want to analyze too much when I'm writing the first draft. I want to get all I can out there until I reach the point where I'm just forcing it. Forcing it -- the writing -- almost never works. It seems that it has to be as natural as it can.

So you have some thinking to do, then?

It's more than this weird subconscious thing where it kind of...marinades, for the lack of a better word. It percolates for a while. I have to see if I'm interested in it, and there's all these kind of bookmarks, you know...Do I like the words? Is it preachy?

You really don't like preachy, do you?

I hate preachy with a red hot passion.

I do too. I feel insulted when a song is preachy.

Yeah, it's so condescending.

So we'll see. If it keeps my interest, I'll keep you posted on how this song is going.

That would be great, farmboy.

I really want to write great songs, man. You have no idea how important it is to me. It's like oxygen and water.

And nobody has to be involved with this. That's one of the things I like about songwriting. No one can stop you from it. It's yours. It's a personal thing. No one can take it away from you.

It belongs to you.

And I belong to it, I guess. (laughs) It's a win-win situation!




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