Sunday, April 10, 2016
The big question
I'm so sad. I feel like I'm gonna cry all the time and, what's more, I feel like I need to cry. Which ain't a good thing, man.
I'm not sure I agree with you, farmboy. Everybody needs to cry sometimes. You need to get some of this stuff out of you. It's toxic if you keep everything inside.
I know. I know it's no good to keep it bottled in. But what do you do with it? I've never been able to deal with all these stupid human emotions. They're so fuckin' messy.
And then there's the big question: What if I never learn how to walk? It sounds stupid, I know, but it's a very real question. I try not to let thoughts like that enter my mind but that's how powerful those fuckin' feelings are. And I can't allow them to win, man. I can't.
But they're still feelings, farmboy. You don't have to give in to the negative questions but you're going to have to feel your feelings.
I know, man. And that fuckin' sucks, big time.