but I will

I've been walking backwards
retracing my steps
trying to find the way
back to myself
I've lost so many times
I wouldn't place no bets
I ain't no poster child
for mental health

          oh, give me faith
          give me hope
          I'm sliding down
          some slippery slope
          I keep saying yes
          while my heart cries no
          not now
          I don't know how
          but I will

I've been crying 
barrels of tears
I'm dehydrated 
a human cactus tree
I know I'm homeward bound
but I took the long way around
shackled and chained
to being free

          oh, give me hope
          give me dreams
          tell me that the future
          ain't as bleak
          as it seems
          I keep saying no
          while my heart cries yes
          right now
          I don't know how
          but I will
          I don't know how
          but I will